:(

i've just completed my 5th essay, yes, at 5.53am. now. and i'm having a mock paper in 3 hours time, which goes to say i have less than 2 hours of sleep. do i even intend to you may ask.

OF COURSE! I AM FUCKING TIRED! ...

of academia, of almost everybody, of life.

and i was left to do some thinking. random stuffs surfaced in my whirl of thoughts. of which, one that left the most impact was how romantic my love life was...

伤心欲绝。痛哭流涕。磨齿难忘。刻苦铭心。

情为何物？
只叫人生死相许。

但我这伴侣又从何找？何时才找得到？瑞兴，你是他吗？

there was a time, 2 times in fact, where i almost stopped believing in you. but you forgave me for doubting you. your magnanimity, is something i will never possess. darling, why must you be so superior? you make me feel worthless, just as you have made me feel valuable. you have brought us to a whole new level, but the problem is, i've not ascended to what is expected of me. &what's worse, i'm not helping myself.

-sinking deeper into the abyss.