heart, this is for you (:

in barely 6 hours time, it's doom time, yet again. geography paper will be in a mess as i've given up, and succumbed to potential vices that come along every now and then. the laptop, being the ultimate down-bringer, is the primary source of my temptation. not to forget the provision of food and crackers and natural confectionery sweets in the shapes of snakes in colourful banana/grape/orange flavous that never failed to entice my sweet tooth urges. of course, the few-steps walk to the refrigerator, also, is another form of my hideout from the realities of undesirable torturous examination periods where i can obtain instantaneous gratification from making tuna sandwiches and koko krunch in cheap UHT milk in ugly cartons of 'first choice' brand and pushing it down my lazy growling stomach; temporarily taking my mind off the pressures of the knowledge that i have no knowledge of anything for tomorrow's exam at all.

what a sad life.

to further add onto my most exciting episode of today's bleak outlook of my future, the climax would be intrusion of a mini flying ebony beetle and few seconds later a coackroach from nowhere caught my attention that i got so panicked that i have to get help. there i went " kor kor
!kor kor! " so anxiously forcing him out of the toilet to help me combat the helpless pests that only went crawling around my bedroom floors and to withstand my screeching cries for help in amplified decibels for such a small creature like them that i swear they went deaf almost immediately. and brother saves the day from tissue packing these animals pathetically in few wraps of the paper i frantically provided and poof! out of the window they go (still wrapped loosely in the napkins. and i do admit, foolishly that they would fly and come back)

therefore, i decided to seal my windows for good.

now, come to the crux of my post tonight, or rather ,morning.

i love guys who falls deeply in love with their ex girlfriends. and if you dont already know, i'm telling you now.

and yee swee hin, that's not the reason why i love you. because obviously you're not that type. though maybe you may loosely fit into that catergory-- the china gf issue. but, my feelings for you, honestly, is a summary of all that you have done for me. everything. donuts maybe are your best bet in your bribery of my soul, and you, the person that you are(or was, sentimentally), yourself, maybe,is your triumph card and that why i am still with you today. your mole at the left side of your cheek is my personal favourite, not so much of your face as a whole (afterall, i did detest it before) not that you're not handsome in my context, just that maybe inner beauty appeals more to me. you have that inner beauty which i've measured largely in terms of romantic readiness, especially your attempt in proposing that i be your girlfriend for consecutive consistently 16 weeks since i knew you. it was your burning passion and that stubborness and 死缠烂打 （note the word "lan" is a pun, because his methods are really CMI) kind of spirit that is holding me onto you. and now, probably, there is a role reversal in our relationship that i AM THE MAN, but days of those days, are deeply embedded in the most sacred part of my memory. those of which i'll never forget; and never want to forget.

maybe i've said it before. but still, i'm for cliches if it's always useful.

"baby! you're forever my addiction :) better than the works of chocolates. I Love you!"

but boy, how will you ever live up to my platonic perception of you that you have deceived me of?